Pining
by laneypenns
Summary: Milo thinks about one of his best friends. A lot. In a deep, romantically loving way.


Milo thought about his friends a lot. Mostly in the sense of how happy he was to have them, especially on days like today.

Basically, Milo and Zack had ended up in another wild adventure that involved climbing, jumping, and a whole lot of running. But most importantly, Milo had climbed out of a pit of quicksand and reached for Zack's hand -

And his heart _jumped_.

He didn't know why, and he didn't have the time to think about it before, when he was pulling himself out of quicksand, but he realized how much he wanted that hand in his again. It was soft skin against his rough skin, and he wanted to feel it again.

He wanted to intertwine his fingers with Zack's, hold hands with him in a situation where their lives aren't at stake, lean his head on Zack's shoulder and chuckle into his shirt as he breathed in his presence.

Milo pressed his fist to his lips, his face beginning to blush. Processing emotion was never something he was good at… Was this a crush? He thought he had crushes before, but they were never so… Heavy. It was a little bit choking, but in an exciting way. He felt like he needed to run around in the forest and scream to release all the energy he was feeling. And even then, a lot of the energy was a deep sense of _longing_ and he didn't know what he could do with that, productively speaking. Usually if he was filled with energy, he could set it to a productive means, like when he was up on a sleepless night and would get out his toolbox and work on safe-proofing the house, but tonight all he could think about was Zack.

Zack's eyes were dark, almost black, and Milo felt like the next time he looked at them he would get lost in them, and he knew that was cliche, but _by God_. They were deep, and so beautiful, and Milo couldn't ever tell where his pupil ended and his iris began. He wanted to remember them better, he wanted to study them and know every detail about Zack's face and body, he wanted to hug him tight and kiss his cheek and do all those couple-y things. Another thing he knew about Zack was he had little pimples and bumps around his temples and hairline, and he loved those too. He loved the bumps on Zack's upper arms, even if he didn't see them or feel them often because of his shirts, he knew they were there and he couldn't do anything but appreciate everything that Zack was.

Milo stared at his hands as he walked into his bathroom, getting ready to take a shower. After today's whole debacle, it'd probably be best to get clean and go to sleep if he could manage it. He turned on the water to let it start getting warm, then removed his shirt. As he looked at himself in the mirror, he wondered what Zack looked like without his shirt on…

He looked away from his reflection, pushing away the curiosity. It was intrusive, definitely. He wasn't even interested in people's bodies, so he didn't know where the thought even came from. His ears felt hot and he let out an awkward giggle because of the nervous and excited energy building up in his body. He felt so much emotion, so much romantic longing, and he suddenly knew this wasn't just a crush.

This was love. Love as intense as he felt for Melissa, but love that felt like how he felt for Amanda… It felt like a weight of emotion pressing down on him, making him want to cry out into the night that he _loved_ Zack Underwood, and he wanted to kiss him and hug him and hold him close for the rest of his life…

Oh, and hold hands.

Milo stepped into the shower and let the warm water hit his scar-covered skin, looking down at his hands again. There was a scar that circled his ring finger on his right hand, and a scar on his thumb on the same hand. All of his nails were broken down to the quick. His hands were calloused and rough, which was good for the lifestyle he lived - If he had soft, dainty hands that had never felt the touch of rope-burn or cuts from tree bark, he probably wouldn't be able to live very well.

That wasn't to say that Zack's hands were soft or dainty - He was a football player, of course. Zack just had smoother hands… No scars and really no rough patches of skin on his hands, but they were hard hands with thick skin. He had such nice hands, hands that would feel so nice to hold, a hand that would be nice to take into his own hand and kiss his knuckles.

Milo let the water soak his hair and massage his shoulders, sinking down to the floor of the tub. He switched the water from shower head to faucet and plugged the drain, deciding he'd go ahead and just take a bath. He studied his body more as the tub filled up. His knees were terribly scarred from almost constant scraping back when he was little, an identical little indentation in each knee. His arms had scratches and scrapes from tons of different adventures just littering them. He knew his face had similar scratches as his arm. On his stomach were multiple incisions from different surgeries he had throughout his life so far. His chest had a large cat scratch from when he had fallen into the tiger exhibit at the zoo.

He hummed as he reached his hand out of the water to touch his scars. He wondered if Zack thought these scars were cool, or cute like how Milo thought Zack's pimples were. Somehow the idea of it made him smile, the idea of Zack kissing the scratch across the bridge of his nose lovingly and telling him how cute his scars were…

Milo buried his grinning face in his hands. Was he really only going to be able to think of being sweet on Zack for the whole night? He sunk lower into the bath water, submerging his head. His ears filled with water and all sound was blocked as he let himself be engulfed by the warm water. He listened to the water rushing into the tub and soaked, deciding to stretch out the length of his bath today. He wasn't going to be able to sleep tonight, anyways, so he shouldn't rush to bed too fast.

He sat in the water and continued running his hands over his scars. Zack was amazing, Zack was a great friend, Zack would probably be a good kisser, Zack was… Comfort, was what he was. Zack was the most comfortable person, next to Melissa, and the only reason Melissa was a more comfortable person was because Milo felt like he was going to die of a heart attack right now.

He giggled again.

Milo wanted to lay his head in Zack's lap and feel Zack's hands stroke his hair while he rested, he wanted Zack to chuckle and say that he loved him and then he would lean down and kiss his lips and Milo would kiss him back, his lips rough and chapped against Zack's soft, thick ones. Milo bit his lip at the thought, his chest being squeezed with feeling again.

He wanted to hear that phrase from Zack. "I love you." Zack could say it while they hung out somewhere, he could take Milo's hand and pull him closer and whisper it into his ear and Milo would hug him and say it back and they'd kiss and it would be so good. It would be amazing.

Milo loved Zack's dark skin, he loved the bumps and pimples on it, he loved his dark black eyes, he loved his smooth and hard hands, he loved his neatly trimmed fingernails, he loved his long eyelashes, he loved his curly hair that just looked a little bit purple in the sunlight, he loved, he loved, he loved -

He loved Zack. He loved everything that Zack was, he loved how Zack's voice cracked when he was worried, he loved how Zack would cling worriedly to Milo or Melissa when he was scared, he loved how Zack covered his eyes when they were too high up or covered his ears when an explosion was too loud, he loved how after all the dangerous stuff had passed Zack would laugh and be happy, like he had just gotten off of a terrifying rollercoaster and was now excited to go again. He loved Zack's enthusiasm and when he was happy. Zack was radiant, he was comfort, he was Milo's closest new friend, one of Milo's best friends.

He was gorgeous.

Milo climbed out of the bathtub, his fingers pruned. He dried off and put on his pajamas, then went to his room and sat down at his desk, sighing. He needed to get the energy in his chest out somehow, but he couldn't. He couldn't shriek or squeal about loving Zack, and he wasn't sure he could set his emotions to anything else right now. He flapped his hands, giggling hysterically as he thought more about Zack, his thick lips and big hands and his lovely smile that made his eyes scrunch up and shine.

Milo thought about texting Melissa to tell her how he was feeling. She was always so interested in his life, after all, but he felt like she might make fun of him for having such a sudden crush on their best friend. He thought about telling Sara, but she'd get too excited and she'd try to push them together so much more than Milo would be able to handle, considering how he was feeling right now just _thinking_ about hanging out with Zack. Who else could he tell? He could tell Zack…

His face burned. He _definitely_ could not tell Zack.

There really wasn't anybody he could talk to, he supposed. That shouldn't be a problem, he'd be fine just thinking about Zack and loving him… It wasn't a bad feeling, so he could hold it in.

He stood up and spun around, stretching his hands out to his sides and spinning until he was dizzy, then falling on the ground when he couldn't stand anymore. He giggled again, staring at the spinning ceiling as he literally wallowed on the ground. He calmed down quickly, turning over and standing up again. He was starting to realize that his original assumption that he wouldn't sleep tonight might of been speaking too soon, as he was starting to tire himself out. He climbed up to his bed and laid on his back, pulling his covers up to his chin, and blinked, his excitement at love beginning to calm down. Replacing it was a deep sense of contentment and happiness, and he smiled as he turned over onto his side. He pulled one of his pillows into his arms to hug it and sighed, smiling.

He was excited to see Zack tomorrow.


End file.
